Friday, March 13, 2015

It's Day 8 of 100 And....

I've made it to day 8 of my 100 day challenge. So far, I've only missed 1 day of logging my food, and I've been able to keep at least half of my exercise goals. This week, though, I will have gone to the gym 3 times!!! That's huge for me. I've never gone to the gym three times in one week, so I'm super proud of myself.

Ever go workout super hard or maybe even not all that hard, but you find yourself looking at the mirror later like...

As if you're suppose to see results that fast, right? I do this ALL. THE. TIME. Working out has brought out the narcissist in me I swear.

On a super positive note though, yesterday the husband told me that I feel smaller when he wraps his arms around me. I was all like...

BIG confidence boost for me there. It's nice when someone else can tell a difference in your body and that all of your hard work is somewhat paying off.

I still have a long ways to go, but I already feel so great. I try to keep my calorie count to about 1400 a day. Sometimes I go a tad lower, but not by much because I flippin' love food. Seriously, it's the best. My biggest love is sugar. I'm a sugar FIEND. If I could have dessert with every meal you wouldn't hear any complaints from me.

Not that I'm trying to tempt any of you that read my blog for inspirational purposes, but I found the BEST brownie in a mug recipe. BUT. Proceed with caution. This sucker has like 568 calories per mug. If you have a cheat day once a week, then I encourage you to indulge in this beauty. You won't regret it. Unless it's not a cheat day and you totally kill your diet today with it in which case you might regret it. Remember guys. With great power comes great responsibility. Respect the power of the brownie.

Unfortunately, I don't have my weight updates for you. My scale needs a new battery because every time I step on to weigh myself it reads "LOW". I'm pretty sure I didn't lose THAT much weight THAT fast. I'll have those updates by next week for everyone to see how I'm doing though. I'm pretty excited about it.

Till next time my fellow curvy friends!

-The Curvy Lady

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Day 2...

It's day 2 of my 100 day journey and all I have to say is wow... I had no intentions of going to Sonic today to get an ice cream cone, nor did I plan on having a mock-tail (super delicious btw), and I sure didn't plan on eating a mini chocolate pie (which was also amazing to the tastebuds).

In the moment I was all like,

But now I'm all like...

Seriously, I've had a very conflicting day.

Not to worry though! Tomorrow is another day and even though I totally bombed my calorie count today due to too much goodness in my life, I still logged all of my food. That in and of itself is a victory to me because I totally knew by the end of dinner that I'd blown it. I was seriously tempted to not log the rest of my calories for fear of seeing the damage I'd done. Surprisingly it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.

I've been feverishly studying for my economics exam coming up this Monday (and by feverishly I mean I've been watching copious amounts of Gilmore Girls on Netflix and "studying" at the same time). As soon as this exam is over with, it's back to the gym with me!

Until next time my fellow curvy friends.

-The Curvy Lady

Friday, March 6, 2015

The 100 Day Challenge

I'd hit a major depressive slump the past couple of weeks, which is why I haven't posted. I haven't even had the guts to actually finish a day of logging my calories on Myfitness Pal because I made it public and suddenly I've become self-conscious of what others think about my food journal... I'm totally embarrassed by this to say the least. I've been hiding behind my excuses and just telling myself that I would pick it all up again the next day. It's been weeks. The only reason why I would log onto Myfitness Pal for a while was just so I could keep my track going. Myfitness Pal keeps track of how many days in a row you log in and will even post for you when you've hit little landmarks. I got to 10 days in a row, but when it posted it and people congratulated me and liked my little automatic post I felt like a fraud. I wasn't actually counting my calories at all. I was still eating what I wanted, promising myself I'd log it later, or start tomorrow, and have been coming up with excuses to not exercise which has also aided into my depression.

I lay in bed last night thinking about my excuses and the choices I've been making about my health. I began to think about how long this journey has been taking me. I actually started this journey back in June of 2014. I'm sad to say that it's slowly coming up on a year and I'm not even halfway done yet. I also began to realize that I've ripped two pairs of pants in a week because they don't fit... While my husband will tell me all day long that I'm desirable to him and he loves me and finds me very attractive... I personally don't feel this way. I don't feel desirable. I don't feel sexy. This is a hard thing for me. I find myself avoiding my own gaze in the mirror. I do the quick once over to make sure my bangs are pulled away from my face or that I don't have any bumps in my ponytail, but then I move on as quickly as possible. These emotions have been building upon each other slowly for the past few weeks. And last night when I was lying there awake trying to slow my thoughts so I could sleep I decided that I needed to do something. I've never stuck with anything for 100 days. Especially not health related. I know that most people would say, "Start slow. Just go for 30 or 60 days. Heck just go for 10 to get yourself going." But I can't do that. See, I'm a bit of a red personality (mostly blue, but I have a strong red undertone), and I need something that is a bit more of a challenge to get me going. I know 100 days seems nuts, but I feel like this is what's going to help me reach my health goals.

So here's day 1 of 100. I'm going to log my food today and begin to make plans to exercise more. I want to exercise at least 1 hour 3 times a week. I plan to log my food everyday, even if I go over my calorie count. While the object is to make my calorie goal, I don't plan on beating myself up if I go over a day or two. I'm simply trying to establish the habit of logging everyday.

I also have a few more goals that I really want to meet.

1. Be able to fit into my old clothes (or even my current clothes for that matter) without things ending like this:

2. I would also like to be able to wear my wedding band again without things ending like this when it gets frickin' stuck...

3. I would love to be able to look at myself like this in the mirror:

(minus the whole hairy chest thing...)

And then my life will be complete guys! (Just kidding.)

For all of you really cool people who are on Myfitness Pal (if you're not you need to join the cult like now) please add me as a friend and we'll do this together. My name is The Curvy Lady (duh) and you can find me there. Happy Friday my fellow curvy friends.

-The Curvy Lady

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Shooting For the Moon (Pics Included)

Ok guys... The numbers are in, the data has been gathered, and the results are ready. This is the part where I bear my soul, my body, and my imperfections in their rawest form. It's scary. I'm scared and I can't believe I'm actually going to do this, but then again, this is why I started this blog. I started this so I could be brave. Brave enough to face my own imperfections and fear and make myself look at them head on instead of avoiding them. I'm not hiding behind baggy clothes, behind my excuses, or behind anyone else's excuses on my behalf.

This is me right now. My husband literally took these pictures of me just last night. It's the most recent picture of my body that I have. I'm showing you everything, stretch-marks and all. I already know that the bra I'm wearing is too small. Once again, this is the part of me that's still in denial that I need to get a bigger one because I think I can still make this one "work." I've got a profile and a full on shot of where I'm at now. I've even gone as far as to gather up the numbers of my measurements and show you where I'm at with my health.

Ok so here are the numbers now:

Height: 5 feet 4 inches
Weight: 170.4 pounds
Waist: 37 inches
Hips: 44 inches
Bust: 40 inches
BMI: 29.2
Ideal weight: 124-138 pounds

So there it is. I use to weigh more. Just a while ago I weighed approximately 183 pounds. I've been able to shed a little over 10 pounds so far, but have hit the biggest plateau ever. I've been fluctuating from 169 to 173 for the past six months and I'm so sick of it. I don't really like what I see in the mirror and I'm fighting for my self esteem and confidence right now.

32. 4 pounds to lose

I know what you're thinking...

Just over 30 pounds doesn't seem like a lot of weight to lose, but for me this is HUGE. I've never done anything like this in my life and I doubt myself a lot. So encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

Here's the thing though. If you're looking at this and all you're going to tell me is that I don't have a lot to lose or that I "look great" please save it. I've heard these comments from a lot of people and to be honest it was these comments that kept me thinking that I was "good" or "ok" where I was with my health. Instead, I need encouragement to making my goals. Losing weight is hard enough without people making excuses for me or telling me I'm "fine." I'm not fine. I'm OVERWEIGHT. No, I'm not morbidly obese, but if I don't change my lifestyle and take care of myself now it's a possibility. Both of my parents are overweight, both of them have major health problems, and I really don't want that for myself later on down the road.

Just know though, that encouragement, even if it is from complete strangers, helps me to be motivated so I spend more of my time doing this:

And less of my time doing this:

 -The Curvy Lady

Weight Loss Blog? Or Mommy Blog?

I've been giving this some though because I know that there are a lot of mommy blogs out there and a lot of weight loss blogs as well. For this blog though it's both a mommy and a weight loss blog. There may be days when I post about my adventure to the gym or about how I couldn't get my kids to go down for a nap. Then there will be days like today when you get to read about both. Luck you!

I started off today with a lot of motivation (because duh, I started this blog just yesterday and was super excited to com up with something to blog about!) and decided to go to the gym this morning. I just recently got a gym membership at Gold's Gym simply because they had Kid's Care and I take care of the little guy all day while the hubby is at school/work. I was feeling especially confident this morning and decided to give the RPM class a try. It started out great! My legs were on fir, my butt hurt, and I was breaking a bit of a sweat. ANd that's when they said that the warmup was done and it was time to do the actual workout. WHAT? You people need to calm down. These are STATIONARY bikes for crying out loud. You're not even going anywhere. Although, I will say that the choice in upbeat music definitely got me pumped and I was actually enjoying myself despite the fact that I felt like I'd been riding a horse for 3 hours and my butt was killing me after only 10 minutes of being on the equipment. It was at this time though that one of the workers from Kid's Care came in to let me know that my little guy was melting down and asked if I could come and get him. I was actually a little relieved but disappointed at the same time. Disappointed because I really wanted to finish the class, and relieved because my legs already felt like jelly. I would have walked down the stairs with her but seeing as it was my first time being in an RPM class I let her know I'd jsut meet her there and took the elevator instead.

This is a pretty accurate depiction of how that walk to the elevator went.

I got home with wee man and did my mommy thing. Made brunch/lunch, played with him, changed a diaper, saved him from himself a few times, and so on. I decided that since my workout at the gym was cut short that I'd make up for it by playing the Wii a little. After that I considered myself to have had a successful exercise day. So now I can do more of this:

I just kidding guys! But really...

I will say though that being active and finding time for myself is a lot harder with a child in tow. I love that kid more than words could ever express. But there's definitely sacrifices that are made when motherhood comes around. I think I'm still adjusting to a lot of them and at times am still overwhelmed at the fact that I'm a mom. Ok so my baby is 9 months old. I should be use to this by now, right? Ha! WRONG. I'm not. I'm still ever adjusting and ever trying to find a balance. I know I'm not alone in this but when you're going about your day routine and the meltdowns happen and you just want to have one yourself it sucks because there's no one right there by your side to reassure you it's going to be Ok. Thank goodness for chocolate though, right?

-The Curvy Lady

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

I Gained Two Pounds Yesterday...

Ughh… That’s all I have to say about this day. You ever have those days where literally giving up is sooooo much easier than going on? This was definitely up there for me as being one of the worst days ever…

We’re poor, live on benefits, are unemployed, are students, and full-time spouses and parents. Life’s hard, but as I’ve said before not impossible. Just hard. Here’s the thing though. Because we live on these benefits we have to fill out forms, send them in, make sure all information needed on said form in correct, and wait for a phone call or a letter in the mail, then send back more information if need be, etc. etc. etc.

We were suppose to receive a recertification letter in the mail over a month ago. We never received said document so our benefits got cut. I was confused and tried calling them on their customer service line because I had no knowledge of this form but only got an automated woman to talk to. I then went on the website and found a different number, called them and was told that to fix the problem all I needed to do was go to the nearest county office and fill one of the forms out there. Ok, no problem. I went to do that today… Oh, I filled out the form alright. Got it turned in and everything, but when I mentioned not receiving the form in the mail the woman assisting me looked it up on her computer and said, “It says right here we sent you one.” “I know that. But we never received it. Are we going to be penalized for turning in this form now?” “Yes,” she said. The look I gave her next…

For me, being on benefits and having to rely on ANYONE else for help is the HARDEST thing I’ve ever had to do. I’m a highly independent person and am not one to ask for help even if I really need it. Damn that pride of mine.

So needless to say, it’s been one of those days and I’ve been emotional/stress eating all day. The benefits issue is just the tip of the iceberg for the year of 2015. So far, it’s been a rough ride. It’s been a humbling ride. It’s been stressful. Hence, the extra two pounds I’ve probably gained in one day because of the extra carbs I’ve loaded up on. It helps comfort me in the moment but then I regret it in the long run. Today, I was willing to make that sacrifice.

-The Curvy Lady